The Space Between
One of my favorite songs of all time... 'The Space Between' by Dave Matthews. I think I'm living that song just now -- being caught in a middle. A Tale of Two Cities. Two conflicting emotions.
I'm growing gradually more excited to be here. It's only been a week tonight and I've experienced so much, yet still so little. The excitement spawns from knowing there's still so much to do and to take in... if only I didn't have to work. :)
I'm growing gradually more sad about leaving Seattle. Note the present tense? That's exactly the space I'm between. It still feels like a process rather than a done deal. I'm starting to feel increasingly more distant from the stories I was able to weave with -- and create as -- my own. I told my friend Jesse today that I'm already starting to feel like it'll be hard on me to go back. I'm not sure what that means, but know it's something I've struggled with in the past. Lives go on; tales continue to be told... and I haven't been there daily to experience them to really have the best perspective. This is life, I realize. Yet, this is something I've struggled with since the dawn of time. Everything is pregnant with significance to me; I'm always expecting.
All that said, tonight marks Week One in New York City. At the seven-day mile marker...
WORK. I've now enjoyed a week of work. I've settled at my desk; I've just started to really get to know those folks I sit around and near. I feel like there is a lot of closure to my old job now and can really start to focus on my task at hand. I feel like I've been incredibly smart politically, having already navigated several interesting scenarios with grace and perspective (the coffee machine incident; the Altas sales presentation). I got my first, "we need a guy like you around here" comment from a guy I sit next to -- that felt AWESOME, I have to admit.
HOME. I'm starting to feel more comfortable in my apartment. My TV was delivered this morning. I figured out that the shower wasn't really clogged (it had a secret drain latch that I wasn't aware of but discovered when enjoying a BM last night). And, I was able to figure out a cocka-may-me solution to the water temperature and pressure problems I was having in the shower! It certainly also helped that I 'entertained' tonight... Michele and Gary Little came over. We enjoyed a Mexican feast with leftovers from Wednesday's presentation/luncheon and probably enjoyed several too many adult beverages (yes, I stocked up on Captain Morgan, Vodka, Mud Slide mixer and Ginger Ale in the past seven days.). So, it is becoming more like home. It was just so comfortable tonight, in spite of its emptiness because the Littles were here to fill it with the intangibles -- friends, voices, stories, laughter, joy, the making of memories. These things are priceless to me -- thank you, dear neighbors and friends!!
I sleep tonight with a sense of peace and a sense of longing... longing to know what's next; longing to bridge these worlds and to share this excitment. I also long to be doing interesting things, writing interesting words in this blog, sharing interesting adventures, while also nesting and making this place become mine in every particular.
I also long to crash and sleep hard -- Gary, this word is for you. :o)
Good night!!
I'm growing gradually more excited to be here. It's only been a week tonight and I've experienced so much, yet still so little. The excitement spawns from knowing there's still so much to do and to take in... if only I didn't have to work. :)
I'm growing gradually more sad about leaving Seattle. Note the present tense? That's exactly the space I'm between. It still feels like a process rather than a done deal. I'm starting to feel increasingly more distant from the stories I was able to weave with -- and create as -- my own. I told my friend Jesse today that I'm already starting to feel like it'll be hard on me to go back. I'm not sure what that means, but know it's something I've struggled with in the past. Lives go on; tales continue to be told... and I haven't been there daily to experience them to really have the best perspective. This is life, I realize. Yet, this is something I've struggled with since the dawn of time. Everything is pregnant with significance to me; I'm always expecting.
All that said, tonight marks Week One in New York City. At the seven-day mile marker...
WORK. I've now enjoyed a week of work. I've settled at my desk; I've just started to really get to know those folks I sit around and near. I feel like there is a lot of closure to my old job now and can really start to focus on my task at hand. I feel like I've been incredibly smart politically, having already navigated several interesting scenarios with grace and perspective (the coffee machine incident; the Altas sales presentation). I got my first, "we need a guy like you around here" comment from a guy I sit next to -- that felt AWESOME, I have to admit.
HOME. I'm starting to feel more comfortable in my apartment. My TV was delivered this morning. I figured out that the shower wasn't really clogged (it had a secret drain latch that I wasn't aware of but discovered when enjoying a BM last night). And, I was able to figure out a cocka-may-me solution to the water temperature and pressure problems I was having in the shower! It certainly also helped that I 'entertained' tonight... Michele and Gary Little came over. We enjoyed a Mexican feast with leftovers from Wednesday's presentation/luncheon and probably enjoyed several too many adult beverages (yes, I stocked up on Captain Morgan, Vodka, Mud Slide mixer and Ginger Ale in the past seven days.). So, it is becoming more like home. It was just so comfortable tonight, in spite of its emptiness because the Littles were here to fill it with the intangibles -- friends, voices, stories, laughter, joy, the making of memories. These things are priceless to me -- thank you, dear neighbors and friends!!
I sleep tonight with a sense of peace and a sense of longing... longing to know what's next; longing to bridge these worlds and to share this excitment. I also long to be doing interesting things, writing interesting words in this blog, sharing interesting adventures, while also nesting and making this place become mine in every particular.
I also long to crash and sleep hard -- Gary, this word is for you. :o)
Good night!!
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